Pinch: Chapter 4

F.P.W.?  Seriously?  Could I really have bumped into, of all people, the mysterious Felix P. Willowtree?  I had to find out more about this guy.  He was practically stalking me, for Pete’s sake!  Okay, stalking was probably taking it too far, but this was too weird!

Netflix momentarily forgotten, I sat down at my computer and quickly brought up the internet.  Google wouldn’t let me down, surely!  But after trying several variations of his name, and even after entering in the catchphrase “call when you’re in a pinch,” I had zero hits.  That’s right.  Zero.  Zilch.  Nada.  It was like he didn’t exist!  Blast you Google!

I sat back with a sigh.  I suppose I could just call the number on the card, but if there was one thing I hated it was talking on the phone, especially when I didn’t actually know what to say once someone picked up!

I stood up and stalked away from the computer.  After no less than half a dozen trips around my tiny apartment I was no closer to figuring him out.  I was going to have to suck it up and call the number.  I pulled out my phone and the business card and reluctantly dialed the number.  It rang 3 times, and then a voice mail message started playing.

“Felix P. Willowtree.  Call when you’re in a pinch.”

That was it.  No office hours, no address, and spoken in a generic computer generated voice.

“Um, hi, this is Hannah Brewer, from the bar?  You left your card in the tip jar last night and I’m pretty sure you plowed me over on the street just a little bit ago.  Um, at least I think it was you.  I found this button stuck to my boot?  It had your initials on it so I’m assuming it was you.  Anyway, I don’t know what you do or why I’m calling or where your office is, but if you want to call me back my number is 555-9810.  Uh, thanks.  Bye.”

Another dead end.  There was only one person to go to when you wanted to find out about absolutely anyone in this little town.  My mom.

Pinch: Chapter 3

Trust me, I know. I know that it sounds like something right out of a Nora Roberts book. And, trust me again; it felt that way as well. As I attempted to collect myself, feeling and no doubt looking like a drowned rat (blast you, Admiral Rumples!), I prepared to look into the eyes of my incredibly handsome and perfect soul mate. However, my companion in the puddle had already leapt to his feet and walked quickly away, rounding the corner, without so much as a glance at me. Oh. Sorry, Nora, but I guess chivalry is, in fact, dead—or at least severely outdated.

When I finally clambered up onto the sidewalk, cursing and splashing all the way, I heard a faint, whiny meow from the alleyway nearby. Too focused on returning the cat to Mrs. Crumpet and returning myself to my couch-dwelling, I ran into the alley without letting my eyes wander in the direction of my elusive puddle-companion.

Admiral Rumples, quite ungrateful for my rescue mission, was safely returned to the overbearing arms of his blubbering master just in time for his “din-din” and their favorite game show (big eye roll).  Still blubbering with gratitude, Mrs. Crumpet promised to bake me a batch of her peanut butter cookies.  I suppose this morning’s adventure wasn’t all bad.

I sloshed back up to my apartment with nothing but Netflix on the brain. As I slid off my raincoat and stepped out of my boots, I heard a small “plink” on the floor behind me. I turned around and picked up a tiny silver button that had apparently gotten lodged in the bottom of my boot during my little conquest.

It read, to my now complete bafflement, the initials “F.P.W.”

Pinch: Chapter 2

Doorbell ringing. What?

“Hannah!  I know you’re in there!” 

Oh no, not Mrs. Crumpet.  Cordelia Crumpet, my well-meaning but perpetually interfering next-door neighbor was at the door, and there was no getting away from Cordelia Crumpet once she decided to zero in on you.  I burrowed out of my nest of blankets and shuffled to the door.

“Hi Mrs. Crumpet,” I said, opening the door and plastering on a smile.

“Hannah, I’m so sorry I know it’s your day off but I can’t find Admiral Rumples!”

Admiral Rumples is Mrs. Crumpet’s ancient orange tabby cat.  A bag of bones with a grating, scratchy voice, much like his owner, Admiral Rumples is Mrs. Crumpet’s only companion and quite beloved.  He also has a very nasty habit of pooping on my newspaper.

“I let him out last night before Dateline and he hasn’t been back!” she shrieked, wringing her hands.  “I’m worried sick!  What if he’s hurt?  What if he’s hungry?  He missed his din-din and his brekky!”

“Okay, okay,” I sighed, resigned to a day spent poking around in alleys and shrubbery.  “I’ll go look for him.  You stay here in case he shows up.  I’m sure he’s nearby.”

I slipped on my boots and coat, and with one last longing look at my couch, headed out into the cold, wet day.  Rain was coming down in a spray of fine mist, just enough to make it necessary to walk with your head down and shoulders hunched, so I’ll admit I wasn’t doing a great job of looking around for Admiral Rumples.  Mostly I was watching my boots squelch through the puddles on the sidewalk and cursing that damn cat.  It should have come as no surprise, then, when I rounded the corner and slammed into a solid male wall, sending both of us crashing to the ground.

Pinch: Chapter 1

“Dr. Felix P. Willowtree. Call when you’re in a pinch.” That’s all it said.

Well, and a phone number of course.

I found this strange little business card in the tip jar at the end of my shift at The Sundown Grille–the bar where I work–last night. We weren’t too busy, so I can’t believe I didn’t catch who dropped me this little “tip.” I don’t often find myself in pinches, and I surely don’t know anyone with such an exotic name as Dr. Felix P. Willowtree. It sounds made up. It even rhymes, come on. I’m actually jealous because the only thing anyone has ever rhymed with my name is: banana. Hannah Banana, real original. Anyway, there are only about twenty different last names in our little town. I don’t even think we have any willow trees. No Willowtrees, no willow trees.

It must’ve been dropped into the tip jar accidentally, perhaps by a customer who imbibed in one too many of our “WORLD-FAMOUS MARGARITAS.” County-famous is a bit more accurate. Perhaps said over-imbibing-tip-dropping customer was attempting a margarita pun, like, “Call me when you’re in a pinch because I’d like a pinch of salt in my next margarita.” Things like that are always funny when you’ve had a few margaritas. I guess I’ll ask around tomorrow and see if my coworkers saw anyone looking like a “Dr. Felix P. Willowtree.”

As for today, it’s my day off. Ahh, Wednesdays. My goal today is to eat a world-record-breaking amount of cereal and binge-watch something on Netflix. Although it’s a beautifully sunny and perfect day, I want to take zero chance of having to talk to an actual real life person. Wednesdays are my Hannah Recharge Days.

Gigantic bowl of cereal? Check. Many, many (all of the) blankets? Check. Netflix loading? Check.

Doorbell ringing. What?

The Kraken Project

Hi. Remember us? We’ve been busy as bees at the corner of Main and Merrin, and haven’t blogged in quite some time. But even the busiest blogger bees find time to read. I just finished The Kraken Project by Douglas Preston. While I’m partial to Preston–he and Lincoln Child co-author my favorite series of all time–this book is seriously so good. So, before I give my review (spoiler alert: it’s FANTASTIC), I have a few questions for you to help determine whether or not this book is for you.

1) Are you a person?

2) Are you a super smart self-modifying Artificial Intelligence program?

If you answered “yes” to either of the above questions, read on…

The Kraken Project is book four in Douglas Preston’s “Wyman Ford” series. While it is a great series, this Sci-Fi novel can be read as a stand-alone. It is the story of NASA computer programmer, Melissa, and her life’s work: an AI program she lovingly calls Dorothy. Dorothy’s mission is to be sent on an exploration to the largest sea on Saturn, the Kraken Mare, in hopes of discovering potential for inhabiting life. As one might expect, things go terrifyingly wrong.

Dorothy is eerily humanlike. She appears to have feelings: anger, vengeance, fear. All feelings that are frustrating to have as a human, but even more complicated for a computer program that technically cannot even experience feelings. Dorothy has declared a new mission for herself: to rid the world of the “disgusting human race.”

I won’t give anything away, but in typical Douglas Preston fashion, the story spirals in directions that my brain would have never even imagined. It is just outrageous enough and just possible enough that it will leave you slightly unsettled, paranoid, and all the way out on the edge of your seat waiting for the next book in the series.

There are two print copies, one Audiobook, and one Playaway available in the Paulding County Carnegie Library system. Check out your preferred format today!

-Suzi

Indulging In Old Favorites

School has started, Labor Day is coming up, and Fall with its cooler temps and crisp air is right around the corner! For some of us, the end of Summer is something to be mourned, but for the rest of us, the end of Summer is a real celebration! We love the changing colors, the cooler days and crisp, clear nights. We love everything pumpkin and spice and we can’t wait to break out our sweaters and boots. Fall means football games, warm apple cider and Halloween!

For me, Fall also means a return to bubble baths, and stepping into a steamy tub filled to the brim with fragrant bubbles just wouldn’t be the same without a great book to read while I soak. I always find myself returning to my favorite books when I’m looking for a good bubble bath read. Isn’t it just like sinking into a warm bath when we return to old favorites? There is something so comforting about catching up with characters we love.

Some of my favorite books to read in the bath (or let’s face it, ANYWHERE) include “The Stand” by Stephen King, the “Harry Potter” series by JK Rowling, “The Secret Garden” by Frances Hodgson Burnett, the “Otherland” series by Tad Williams and, guilty pleasure alert, basically anything by Nora Roberts. I can re-read a book a dozen times and still find something new to love about the story and characters. As Oscar Wilde once said, “If one cannot enjoy reading a book over and over again, there is no use in reading it at all.”

What are your favorite books to read in the tub?

Laina

I Love You More

I just finished I Love You More by Jennifer Murphy and could not wait to share my thoughts. It is seriously so good. Like Gillian Flynn’s Gone Girl meets a Lifetime movie good.

Oliver Lane had three wives, three families, three totally separate and secret lives. That is, until he was murdered at his beach house. You can probably guess who did it, right? With his three scorned wives, it really isn’t too tough to point your literary crime-solving finger at the prime suspect(s). I could not turn the pages quickly enough.

I love when a book is narrated by multiple characters. If you’ve read my previous posts, you’ll know how much I invest in a book’s characters. I had quite a return on my investment in this case. Each chapter was told from the point-of-view of the three main (living) characters: Picasso, the 11-year-old daughter of wife #1, Kyle Kennedy, the lead detective with a questionable rapport, and The Wives, a collective perspective of Oliver’s three wives.

It’s been a while (ok, since Gone Girl) that a murder mystery has made me think about more than “whodunit?” This book made me think about relationships, humanity, right vs. wrong, being a mother and a wife and a woman. It is rich with book-discussion possibility. Evoked in the reader is the moral-tipping question, “what would I do?” Aside from all the thinking and sympathizing, the story moves at a fantastic pace filled with enough supplement to the main plot that I just wasn’t quite sure what was going to happen. And, let me tell ya, the twists and turns and shock factors of Ms. Murphy’s story are top-notch.

I highly recommend this book. Walk, run, SPRINT to your library and check it out for the weekend. Sorry, our copy is already checked out!

-Suzi

 

 

Reader’s Advisory: Young Adult

I’m 26. I’m still a “young adult,” right? Right?? While I am not entirely sure about the parameters of the Young Adult audience, I actually think that it really doesn’t matter. A good book should transcend it’s target-audience boundaries. Enter YA fiction. I recently read two new books from our YA department: We Were Liars by E. Lockhart and The Truth About Alice by Jennifer Mathieu. Both sit right around 200 pages. Both have been on the New York Times Best Sellers lists. Both instantly sucked me in. Did both win the gold pink star of my personal recommendation? If I had such a sticker, it would most definitely be pink. I digress…

Let’s start with We Were Liars. To be honest, I had it all figured out about 2/3 of the way through the book, but that doesn’t mean it still wasn’t a great read. Lockhart’s writing style is superb. Her voice is refreshing, honest, and fun to read. Writing style is just as, if not more, important as the story to me. She used comparisons and words that I would never have thought to use. Even her sentence structure was new for me. In short? I dug it.

It’s dark, a bit confusing, a bit rebellious. Oh, and heart-wrenching. Think back to your teenage years: did you do anything that one might deem as stupid? Reckless? Ok, now imagine if those foggy acts of teenage impulse resulted in life-shattering consequences for you and all you loved. Ugh. I don’t want to spoil the story, but if you do read this, prepare for your world to come crashing down. That is, if you’re like me, and have this annoying habit of placing yourself directly in the soul of any protagonist of anything you read. Read this book. Like I said, it is fairly short. If you hate it, I’m sorry, but at least you didn’t invest too much time in it. My guess is that you won’t hate it.

The Truth About Alice. The title suggests that you might actually find out the truth about Alice. You do not. When I first finished this book, I was actually quite dissatisfied. The ending isn’t delivered to its reader in a neat, pretty little package with a (pink) bow. It also doesn’t imply that a sequel is in the works. Close the cover and you’re done. Upon further reflection, I realized that this is exactly why this book is worthy of reading. We (yes, I’m speaking for us collectively now) are used to having all the loose ends of a story tidied up for us in 300 pages.

Each chapter reads from the first-person perspective of different characters throughout the book. Chances are, if you went to high school, you will find some relatable qualities in more than one of these characters. As a whole they are very stereotypical: popular girl, popular boy, dorky-girl-turned-popular, geek boy, scandalous girl, etc. However, each stereotype is disproved as you delve deeper into the story. Mathieu made me understand and even sympathize with each character (ugh, feelings). I admire that in an author.

Tragedy, parties, scandal, rumors. This book IS high school (the kind you see in movies anyway). I walked away with a reminder to never judge a book by its cover, to not always believe everything you hear, and that there are three sides to every story: yours, theirs, and the truth. Age-old morals, sure, but always good ones to keep in mind.

If you read these books, let us know what you think! They are great for conversation. I award them both a coveted pink star. Maybe even one with glitter.

16, 26, 46, 56, etc… age is just a number, YA is just a label.

-Suzi

 

Puzzle it Out!

OK, show of hands. Who loves trivia? (raises both hands and one foot…okay, both feet….and my cat also raised one paw, possibly as a show of solidarity but more than likely to request a belly rub…only two strokes though, God help you if you stroke three times…) I absolutely LOVE trivia. Favorite board game? Trivial Pursuit. Favorite TV show? Jeopardy. I try to catch Jeopardy as often as possible and absolutely adore answering the questions along with the contestants.

Suzi and I are pretty sure that a lot of you enjoy trivia just as much as we do, so to celebrate our collective love of trivia we have unveiled a new feature window at the library called “Puzzle it Out!” Stop by the library and take a look at our front window display to try your hand at our 4 trivia questions! Once you have puzzled out the questions, pop inside to fill out an answer sheet. We will enter you into a drawing for a prize and, little bonus, everyone who fills out an answer sheet will get a sweet surprise! If interest is high enough we will make “Puzzle it Out” a monthly feature, so we want to see all you trivia buffs stopping by the library for “Puzzle it Out!”

~Laina

Fizz, Boom, Read: Science & the Arts

Ahh, summer time. Flip flops, pool time, BBQs, Summer Reading Program. This year’s national theme was “Fizz, Boom, Read.” Striking a balance between making sure the kids have fun but still are filling their little summertime heads with knowledge can be tricky.  Honestly, we had so much fun that even I forgot we were learning! I decided to take a somewhat selfish spin on the science theme: Science & the Arts. I’m a huge fan of art and art history, so I jumped at the chance to share my passion with the twenty-two eager attendees. You can imagine how much fun it was to hear them pronounce “Renaissance.”

Week 1: Leonardo the Great

http://www.genebarretta.com

http://www.harpercollins.com/9780061926914/when-i-grow-up#

We began the first session talking about Leonardo da Vinci (say it with me, kids, Leo-nar-do-duh-vin-chi) and his brilliance. We learned about how da Vinci was both a scientist and artist. I read the kids the two books pictured above. Neo Leo: The Ageless Ideas of Leonardo da Vinci  by Gene Barretta taught us about how da Vinci’s works have impacted modern life. I chose When I Grow Up by Al Yankovic for fun. It is about a little boy trying to decide what to be when he grows up. He wants to be a little bit of everything, which I saw as a fun tie-in to da Vinci and his wide range of talents. We made Renaissance berets out of brown paper bags (donated by our lovely local grocery store), and had a paper airplane festival. It was a blast, however I was surprised at how many of the kids had never made a paper airplane before!

Paper airplane festival fun!

Making Renaissance berets

 

Week 2: Sounds & Music

http://www.doreencronin.com

http://www.eric-carle.com

Time to make some noise. Our second session was about music, sounds and vibrations. I read Dooby, Dooby, Moo by Doreen Cronin and the kids LOVED singing along with me. They thought the line, “whacka, whacka, quuuuacckkk,” was particularly hilarious. Next I read The Very Clumsy Click Beetle by Eric Carle. The book is supposed to make a clicking sound with each turn of the page, but as live performances often go, it didn’t work. Insert: improvisation! The children clicked (loudly!) along with me as necessary, which was too cute. Then came the reeeeally fun stuff: we had our own water-filled glass choir! It was so great; one little girl really enjoyed being the conductor and her favorite song was most definitely “Home on the Range.” So fun.

Playing some tunes!

Coloring a musical note page

 

Week 3: Color Chaos

http://www.randomhouse.com/book/219129/the-noisy-paint-box-the-colors-and-sounds-of-kandinskys-abstract-art-by-barb-rosenstock

Just as summer must come to an end, so must Summer Reading. We ended with a super fun activity: a handprint mural! First, we read a story about Russian abstract artist, Vasya Kadinsky. The kids really loved looking at his art. We talked about colors and how to mix colors together to make another. Using only red, yellow and blue paint we made a whole rainbow of handprints. Talk about a great time! They LOVED this and I loved watching their enthusiasm. Not one kid had qualms about getting their hands all messy. Chaos ensued!!

Our beautiful handprint mural!

Mixing red and yellow to make orange. So fun!

Our Summer Reading Program was a huge success. I have just as much (if not more) fun than the kids. Although it just ended last week, I can’t wait to see what we can do next year.

-Suzi